Single? Have your eye on someone but just shy to speak to them? Perhaps you don’t have someone specific in mind, but are looking for new ideas to attract a mate. Well, we’ve got some great tips for you!
A Secret Admirer
There’s something romantic and even exciting about having a secret admirer. Knowing you’ve caught the eye of some mysterious person and it could be anyone! However, in today’s society it’s easy to find out anything about anyone, and can get creepy really fast. Don’t be creepy, be romantic! It can be as easy as signing the card “Guess Who”, but there is so much more possible, why stop there?
NOTE: This is written to guys, but we know girls can be secret admirers too – the only difference is the pronouns.
Where To Start
If you have a crush, you already know where to start. If you don’t have someone specific in mind, choose someone you like and want to get to know better; at least someone who knows your name. Don’t choose your new crush based on looks alone. Find someone who shares your interests and would be happy doing the things that you enjoy as well: sports, hiking, movies, etc.
When it comes to being sneaky, timing is everything: a day is too short, a month is too long. Remember, you want this to be fun and romantic to her, not creepy.
Don’t Be A Creep
(I can’t stress the ‘not creepy’ enough.) Being a secret admirer is easy, just make sure we pay attention to Rule #1! Rule #1: Don’t be a stalker!
DO NOT take a lock of her hair, clothing, etc. That’s just weird, really weird. You don’t want your new crush to go home and change all the locks on her house. Do not do anything that could be seen as illegal or crossing a line.
Secret Admirer Gifts – The Fun Begins
Being a secret admirer is all about thoughtfulness. Doing something sweet for a girl just because is one of the most romantic gestures a guy can make. Make sure you leave a card that says something sweet, but not too mushy. Always sign your card the same, “Your Secret Admirer” or something more clever. You don’t want someone else to take the credit!
Where to leave gifts
It’s always easier to be a secret admirer if you work with the person, or have someone on the inside that can help you out. Just don’t ask someone who would spill the beans to your girl. You can also leave items on the girl’s car, doorstep or mailbox, if you feel she would be okay with this. (Small towns, everyone knows where everyone lives.)
Good Secret Admirer Gift Ideas
- Send Flowers – Send her a small bouquet of roses or her favorite flowers to work with a card attached.
- Create A Mix CD – Creating a mix CD takes time, effort and a lot of thought. Choose songs that you think she will actually enjoy, instead of a mix of romantic songs your mother is more likely to enjoy.
- Cookies & Pastries – Have a box of pastries delivered to your girl’s place of work. (If she’s a health-nut, make sure they are healthy snacks!) She can share them with her friends.
- Send Letters – Send short notes to her with motivational quotes or poetry. Do not make this too lovey-dovey, but something to really lift her spirits. Try to send them from a different town or zipcode to throw her off your scent.
- Scavenger Hunt – Create an elaborate scavenger hunt for her to follow. Don’t make her travel all over town, but do make it interesting.
- Send Emails – Same as with the letter idea above, you can send motivational emails from a specially created address, like: firstname.lastname@example.org.
- Thoughtful – Do thoughtful gestures to show her you care. Leave an umbrella on her doorstep for a rainy day.
- Gift Cards – Leave gift cards to local businesses, such as: restaurants, florists, boutiques, movie theaters, playhouses, etc.
Tip: Wooing her friends is almost as important as wooing her. When you’ve got her friends on your side, you can’t go wrong. Try sending gifts she can share with them.
Bad Secret Admirer Gifts
- Stuffed Animals – Unless your girl is into plushies (some girls are), stuffed animals, especially big ones, can be too cheesy.
- Jewelry – Too expensive to buy for someone who might still say no to you. Plus a big gift like this could scare her off.
- Lingerie – Just no. Don’t go there.
Send her a card that begins a treasure hunt. Divide up a dozen roses so that she can find roses at every spot on the treasure hunt. You might pair them with romantic cards or hand-made gifts. End the treasure hunt with a cute Save the Date card that will be your first real date together.
Do something very special and unique, such as a riverboat or a horse-drawn carriage ride after a romantic dinner. The key to a good reveal is in the planning! Make sure all details are covered and give her a date fit for a princess! Don’t forget to bring her flowers on the first date!
Have all the confidence in the world on this first date, you deserve it! She knows how much thought you’ve put into romancing her and will be overjoyed to finally find out who her secret admirer truly is.
On your first date, be yourself. That’s all you can do. If she responds, excellent!! You’ve got a great start already!
However, just because you’ve done your best at being her secret admirer does not mean she will instantly be your girlfriend. It might require more dates, or she could want to stay just friends. Whatever happens, just let it happen. Do not get mad or make a scene — you can’t force someone to love you. Just enjoy your one special night together on top of the world.
Continue The Romance
If you got your girl through something as romantic as this, you can’t just stop! Keep sending your girl flowers ‘just because’. Write her little notes to say you care. It’s not hard to be romantic, it just takes time.