Being from the south, the relationship between a funeral and flowers is a strong one. In the south our need to show sympathy for one’s loss is great and flowers are our way of expressing that sentiment. Upon hearing that someone we know has lost a loved one, we immediately call our florist and send flowers to the funeral home. Unfortunately in my lifetime this has been my experience too often. But I know that with each sympathy arrangement sent the compassion and caring I feel for the recipient is expressed. I also know that in some small way those sympathy flowers help the recipient through the grieving process. I can’t keep some one from grieving; but, I can do my part to help them through it and flowers are a nice way to do just that.

But I really didn’t know just how important flowers were to the grieving process. That was until recently. First let me say, we all understand how someone can grieving for a mother, father, brother, sister, husband, wife or a friend. We have all grieved for a loved family member. What we forget is that to some of us our family extends beyond humans and often includes the wonderful creatures of this earth. The love for these family members is often as strong as the ones to their human counterparts. In these cases, the grieving process is just as intense requiring the same compassion and support from others.

Six weeks ago I lost my beloved Dudley, our 6 year old beagle/golden retriever mix, to cancer. His death was unexpected and a very emotional time. At the time I was inconsolable and for the first few days after my husband and I cried at the mention of his name. Fortunately for us, we have a great family and friends who showered us with sympathy in the form of cards and phone calls. But one special friend did what all southerners do at a time like this — she sent a beautiful sympathy flower arrangement.

This sympathy arrangement was delivered the day of Dudley’s memorial service (family and friends gathered to spread his ashes in our flower garden).

Orchid Sympathy Arrangement

When they delivered the flowers I cried but at the same time it touched me that someone was acknowledging my sorrow.  Now I know that when you send funeral flowers, you don’t want them to make the recipient cry, but that is part of the process.  For the next few days every time I passed the flower arrangement I thought of Dudley.  At first it made me sad, then the flowers made me remember how much Dudley loved our flower garden.  Although this sympathy arrangement isn’t the only thing that helped me through the grieving process, the message conveyed through the flowers was an influential factor.

Sending funeral flowers is a gracious way to let someone know you care and support them during a difficult time. So, if you have ever been hesitant to send sympathy flowers when someone you know loses a loved one, please remember flowers really do soften the pain.